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Any advice? Dear Reader, You ready, baby? Well, a little bit.
Coolz it if you can, fellas! But more on that later. The risk aspect, I mean, not my ass. There are some basic tips and tricks you can stick to while sharing sexting photos, videos or chats.
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You can anonymise your photos and videos easily by keeping your face out of frame and covering any distinguishing tattoos or scars. Turning the camera so your now-headless self is just against a plain wall is the safest bet. You can blur or pixelate identifying details or certain body parts, if you prefer to tease than reveal all with apps like Pixelote or Nudifier. Many photos taken on camera phones come with a lot of information attached, including the time, date, and location of where they were taken, which you may want to avoid. Editors like Photo Exif Editor can remove this information to give you more privacy and control over your information. So, sticking with apps that offer total encryption for messages and photos seem to be the way to go.
People can open photographs and messages in full view of other people, and they can also record incoming messages using another phone or camera. I say this not to scare you, but to make you see that every expression of your sexuality via technology carries some risk — which brings us to the question of what that risk actually is. You get to keep your career and wife, the first 5 million times.
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On the flip side, look at the number of women who have had their private photos hacked, spread across the internet, and have been harassed and shamed for it. Look at Kim Kardashian — the sex tape of her and Ray J was leaked without her permission, and she is still slut-shamed about it to this day. Has anyone ever shamed Ray J for that tape?? I think not. Misogyny, my old friend, we meet again. No matter how sexy and put together you think you are, you are going to make a clumsy move or find some way to feel awkward.
Does anyone ever actually like the way they look on Skype, in that little box peering around trying to meet their own frantic gaze? You always end up looking poorly lit, washed out, and like you have three chins. And where do you put the camera? On your face? On your…? I have second-hand awkwardness just thinking about it. Guys could get it done in the middle of a tsunami. Dirty text messages are the digital equivalent of foreplay. Or, if you get carried away on your own sex-fest and leave the other person behind hey, it happens to all of us sometimesa little bit of literotica.
Pictures for the boys, words for the girls. When it comes to sex, boys prefer visuals and girls like words. And, keep in mind the poses that work best for them are the ones you hate: All those unflattering views are the sights they know and love. For the love of god, do a rehearsal and, better still, record it and watch yourself. Just smile through the pain like a porn star. Get intimate and talk dirty from the start.
No amount of Cleopatra poses and hastily drunk beer can rescue that situation. Like Juliet, there was nothing else to do but to fall on the dagger and commit digital suicide. Yep, there are now sex tapes of me out there, which will no doubt surface either when I become president or when my non-religious godson, Taco, grows old enough to discover internet porn.